Arts failure

A man who does not know how to refuse, to reach the career heights would be extremely difficult .   if not impossible. After all, he is constantly in danger of wasting his time helping others do their job instead do their own thing. How to learn to give to colleagues?

In addition to the loss of precious time, inability to refuse can affect your emotional state. Experts say that if we say "yes" when we want to say "no", then exposed to stress.

Over time, this can result in unpleasant physical symptoms: headaches, back muscle strain, insomnia. So one way out - to learn to refuse.

The main problem in this case - to stop feeling guilty and not think that because you, a colleague can be a nuisance.

In the end, you are not to blame for the fact that he can not cope with the work. However, this does not mean that it is necessary to refuse rudely.

On the contrary - you need to master the ability to say "no" fair, open and polite.   Your friend needs to understand that you refuse not because they are experiencing negative feelings for him, and because of the fact that you can not set aside time to help.

To learn how to say "no", you need to explore several options, and failure to use them depending on the specific situation.

1. Direct "no." If you drawn people unfamiliar with the request that you deliberately unpleasant, it is better to refuse immediately. Just tell him, "No, I can not" - without explaining why you can not, and without apology.

2. Detailed "no." If you care about the feelings of a man who appeals to you with a request, or are you afraid to spoil relations with him, use this option.

Say, for example: "I know how important for you to submit the report on time, but unfortunately, I can not help you." Of course, it must be said very polite tone.

3. "No" with an explanation. If you know that your interlocutor recognizes only reasoned refusal - say "no" and explain why you can not help him. Just do not go into a lengthy discourse, and frankly - or a colleague will think that you are trying to come up with "excuse."

For example, say: "I can not help you make a report, because tonight I go to parent-teacher meeting."

4. "No" with a delay. If you know that the moment will not be able to help a colleague, but did not want to talk to him a final "no", so to say, "I can not help you now, but maybe I will do it next week."

Be careful not to make specific promises. You just give your colleague an opportunity to ask for your help again, but did not promise to help him.

5. "No" to the alternative. If you aspire to whatever was to maintain good relations with colleagues and be at least something useful to him, she tells him: "I can not help you with the report, but if I can help you more than anything - address."

6. insistent "no." This option should be used if your partner insists on its request and persuades you to help him ignore your refusal. Just repeat "no" as many times as necessary.

For example: your dialogue might look like this:

- Could you help me with the report?

- No, sorry.

- Oh, please, I really need your help.

- No, I'm sorry, I can not.

- Please, I will not stay in debt!

- No, I'm sorry, I really can not help you.

And finally, remember: it is better to be honest to say "no" than to postpone care because of the constant lack of time.

Believe me, in the second case it is much more likely that your relationship with a colleague spoiled the long haul.

Anti-routine therapy

You think that your career has come to a standstill? You devoured routine? With this urgent need to do something, otherwise life will soon begin to appear dark and joyless, you fall into a depression ... What steps should be taken? If your job has turned into a routine, it means

she no longer pleases you. You go to the office exclusively for salaries and hence a minute there you seem endless.

To check whether you are in a trap routine, you can ask yourself the following questions:

- Do you feel that your work is of interest to you?

- Does it require you to mobilize all your forces and the best quality?

- When you think about that ahead of the long working hours, you feel excitement?

If these questions are answered "no" - it's time to come to grips with the routine. It's not as difficult as it seems at first glance.

So you need to take the following steps:

1. Make a decision: what kind of job you really want. People often complain that they are not satisfied with the work, but the answer to this question can not. They say they want to change something, but what exactly - do not know.

Find the courage to think about what you want. Even if at first glance it seems that the dream is not feasible, specify it. And even better - make a list of ten things that you enjoy doing the most.

Then select the three most favorite things. And think - on what work you could do that?

2. Set a goal. The main goal should be, of course, to work a pleasure. But you now need to formulate a smaller goals that will help you achieve major.

Then - break them down into small steps. For example, if you want to create your own beauty salon, you first need to talk to people who already have a business, then a business plan (it may require additional knowledge), to find a room, to find the means, etc.

3. Determine the time frame. For each of the prescribed purposes set deadline. Try to adhere to these deadlines. After all, if you plan to make, for example, your hobby work, it will require you to discipline.

In his current work, you do not allow yourself to delay the deadlines, as well? So why can avoid this with their own dreams?

4. ACTION! Start doing something - the most difficult. And when it comes to realizing the dream, then certainly. After all, subconsciously, we are afraid that it will not work, and therefore will have to admit to myself: I can not do that.

Much easier to present themselves in the mind of the fashion salon hostess than to take concrete steps, right? Try to cope with your fear.

Tell yourself that even if you will fail, you can always try his hand at something else.

And find yourself another chore will be able to even more.

Take the first step, and with each successive you will be happier and easier to engage in the embodiment of their dreams!

How to become an ideal counterpart?

Since the work we have to spend no less time than at home, it is clear that relations with colleagues need to establish no less carefully than with his family. How to do it? Surprisingly, some of the little things is the attitude of your colleagues to you!

Oblique view sometimes is able to ignite a scandal in the office and split the team into two warring armies.

Therefore, in order to be sure that no fines will not affect adversely on your reputation in the eyes of others, listen to the following recommendations:

1. Try not to take things without permission from the tables of their colleagues (staplers, pens, etc.). If you really need - and ask for permission to return the item as soon as you can.

2. Do not litter in the office. If cleanliness is not one of your virtues, you can be considered quite normal to throw a piece of paper by an urn on a table or leave half-eaten sandwich. However, please note - your colleagues it can be very annoying. So try to stick to your company's orders.

3. Do not be too emotional and unrestrained. Do not raise your voice at his colleagues, even if they took you out of yourself. Try not to put pressure on others and to maintain a level mood at work (at least outwardly). Remember that sometimes a single indiscretion can change your reputation. And not for the better.

4. Do not talk on the phone, if you work in an office with colleagues. It was nice to spend time talking with a friend or loved one, but the person sitting at the next table, your chatter certainly be distracted.

5. Do not gossip. You can not prevent your colleagues to share with you the latest news from the life of other colleagues, but in your power not to continue with this chain. If someone tells you a secret, try to restrain yourself and not to pass this information to other colleagues.

6. Do not shoulder on his work colleagues, do not ask for help. Or make it a very, very rare that there is simply no other way. No matter how well you did not belong to man, the constant abuse of his friendship can turn him into an enemy.

7. Do not litsemerte. If you can not say anything good colleague - better not say anything. People feel great insincerity, even if you think you are - a great actress.

8. Rejoice in the successes of others. However, if you can not do it sincerely - see previous item.

9. You do not have to establish friendly relations with all absolutely colleagues. After all it is impossible to please. However, try to still do not interfere with others, but there is a quarrel solved peacefully.

10. Do not let others exploit you. Even if you really want to make friends with colleagues, that is no reason to assume their responsibilities. In the end, you will not gain any friends, and start up a relationship with indifferent and parasitic your personalities.