To save, you need to fall in love

- The tendency constantly deceive others.

- He's always right, and blame others.

- It forces you to leave all that is dear to you, friends, interests.

- With it, you often feel guilty.

It turns out that very many people it begins in childhood. Especially when some of the adults in the family was an alcoholic, he was seriously ill, left the family.

Girls in these families often feel responsible for the happiness and unhappiness of parents. In the future it becomes a strategy in their life constantly sacrificing themselves and be stuck in unproductive relationship.

The best option in this situation would be how to work around the problem with a psychologist. Because in any case, this kind of invincible in the women who rely losers, most people need strong support.

Games daughters and mothers?

Change the partner has not yet succeeded in any man in the world, so do not waste power. But change itself - can be.

Begin to openly express their feelings and desires. Pay attention to what you have left unattended needs.

Carry out at least once a day for some their desire to which you previously "had no right to." Stop being a mom. Stop finally his "help."

Then, in a successful case, you have to make an emotional divorce - and remarry the same man when he will gain the ability to be responsible for themselves.

If it shows (the real things!) The intention to maintain their childhood to old age, let it be his problem. And your problem - to find a more suitable man.

How to choose a life partner

Sexologists and specialists in family relations have long proved that love, brings people together, there remains in our hearts no more than three to five years, and then it replaces the habit.

During this time, the couple must get used to each other, to get a common children, friends, possessions. All of this contributes to the preservation of the family.

But if the spouses are psychologically inconsistent, even the common life and common life goals will not save a marriage from the split. Psychological compatibility associated with the temperament of the person.

In the first half of the twentieth century, the concept of psycho-developed Carl Gustav Jung, the famous disciple of Freud. But the concrete form of Jung's ideas found only in the 70s. The emergence of a science socionics whole world owes to the Soviet Union and personally Aushra Augustinavichiute, which discovered the concept of "co-player", that is the psychological relations full complement of other people.

Consider the four main psycho.

Choleric

People of this type are always in motion. Increased metabolism, bubbling fountain and energy will distinguish them from the gray crowd. In life, these people are maximalists and have many more children traits: curious, fickle, playful, have an easy temper, etc. The relationship is good "harness" passionate, but their deep feelings for a long time is not enough.

Melancholic

This is thin-skinned and always subtle sense of people. Emotional person, most of the time immersed in his inner world. Melancholic hardly withstand the psychological and physical stress from the side. They are characterized by emotional breakdown, after which they may be depressed. Delicate, almost always educated, humble people.

Phlegmatic

Very sensible, leisurely, and at the same time very solid business people. Every word phlegmatic word seriously and has its own weight. Phlegmatic characterized by a low level of mental activity, isolation and weak external expression of emotion. From them and the calmness. With such a man not afraid of domestic difficulties.

Sanguine person

A man with a strong nervous system. His actions thought out, it is resilient, so it is characterized by high resistance to the difficulties of life. The mobility of his nervous system causes the variability of feelings, affections and interests. This sociable person, easy to converge with people, and so it has a wide circle of acquaintances, even though he does not differ constancy in communion and affection.

Select a husband almost science

"Encumbrance" - among Russians of 4 percent lower than among Europeans - 22 per cent. The leaders, surprisingly, Romania. Here 'burdened' nest with an incredible density of 72 percent.

Representatives of this type of men - the perfect family man. For them, the main thing - the wife, children, relatives. At work - money. They consider it their duty to earn more. The rest - like friends, hobbies, entertainment, overtime - a side. They seek as soon as possible to get home, where he spent most of his time.

"Zero liability" - is the fourth and final appearance. Men representing him, unambitious, irresponsible, live for today and do not burden themselves with any obligations. Especially for women.

Basically, they have fun. Serious hobby usually have, since they need too much effort. Prefer passive recreation, for example, just lie on the beach. Or on the couch - with beer at the TV.

The marriage of "zeros" come, but try to put it on a later date as possible. As well as furnishing children. The average of 14 percent - a minority. In Russia, a little more - 16 percent.

Go away, nasty hegemon

Investigation Discovery Networks showed: and the men look different now. It is not considered worthy of emulation "macho image" - a kind of ruthless warrior, invincible monolith hegemony and all the host. Loving saying: "Shut up, woman! "

Traditional norms of "masculinity" has formulated more than 30 years ago, psychologist Robert Brannon:

- "Without babstva» («no sissy stuff») - a man should avoid all feminine;

- "Big boss» («the big wheel») - must succeed and stay ahead of other men;

- "Sturdy oak» («the sturdy oak») - must be strong and not show weakness;

- "Them Again» («give 'em hell») - to be cool and not be afraid of violence.

If one of the modern men and continues to follow these standards, it is faced with sometimes insurmountable problems in relations with modern women. After all, most of them have drastically reduced the demand for authoritarian males.

Suitable - not suitable

Of course, you can "break off" and marry his all, even the representative of the anti-family types - the second and fourth. But the probability of re-it is very small. Especially in adulthood. Sooner or later he would get his habits.

It is understood that men reasonable gain of the first and third species. For some, however, have all the time to make sure that changes regularly shirts and socks. The other will be difficult to get to the theater. But is this a problem for thoughtful wives?

Suitable for marriage for men in Russia are many - 58 percent, more than every second. And for those who would like to start a family with a foreigner, you should look at the French and Swedes. Romania in this sense, there is no price at all. If they still earned normally ...

A coveted for many Russian women are dangerous Germans. As well as Dutch. Great threat to get to the narcissistic peacock.

COMMENT SPECIALIST

The second front is opened for a long time

Igor Kon, professor, chief researcher at the Institute of Ethnology and Anthropology of the Russian Academy of Sciences (RAS): - Before "war of the sexes" was in an intimate relationship - mostly under the covers. Today, men and women compete openly.

The fairer sex involved in the business, production and policies, develop a "male" qualities - perseverance, energy, willpower. And men have lost their once unquestioned dominance, develop traditional "female" features - the ability to compromise, the ability to put yourself in the place of another.

It seems that they both understand the current trend. No threat to men from the women I see. After all, our European colleagues conducted a study shows: modern man can adapt and meet the challenges of the era.

However, it is necessary to take into account the new social realities and not be on a single, and obviously simplified and idealized pattern of hegemonic masculinity. Especially if his personal inclinations and qualities that do not comply.

Black comedy

If the spouse - Ebony

Naive Ukrainian girl summed vision.

Writer Roman Afanasyev established a prize for stupidity, for Russian citizens and for the residents of neighboring countries. He called her "Hello, Fools." The list of nominees is constantly updated on the website http://www.d-awards.ru/.

Here is one of recent history, which has a direct bearing on the problem of selecting suitable husbands.

Girl Ira N. lived in Ukraine. But it is like to live in the United States. Visiting Americans, for whom it would be possible to get married in the town of Rovno were not found. But there were many students from Africa.