How to get rid of loneliness?

Saturday evening. In the room sits a lonely kid. Suddenly he cried out: "I hate weekends!" But there is no one who could answer him. He picks up a magazine, a picture catches the eye of a group of teenagers on the beach vacationers.

The magazine immediately flies to the side. In his eyes welling with tears. Trying to keep them, he grits his teeth - but all in vain. Unable to control himself, he falls weeping on the bed: "Why do I always remain alone?"

Almost every teenager goes through periods of monstrous loneliness, uncertainty and insecurity. It is also compounded by the fear that you're the one in the whole class, there is, in the whole school, not, in the whole universe, including the lower forms of plant life, you experience similar feelings.

You think you're separated from all the invisible wall that surrounds you impenetrable cloud. And no one understands you. Now you're jealous of the very popular girl with a pretty smile and want to be like her - without problems and worries. But even the most popular teenage doubt themselves.

Maybe that same girl is afraid that people do not love it, but only a pretty attractive face. And among those who make up "pop group" also has its own roster: one is the most popular of the popular, but someone standing among them in last place and must somehow put up with it.

In fact, you're not the only one who has a problem and if you risknesh talk about it with friends, you'll be amazed at how well they understand you, and what a relief it will be for them - to be able to talk to themselves about their problems. On the other hand, they may "close the shutters."

Teenagers so desperate to fit his "system" that they are afraid, as if someone did not consider their views or feelings of unusual. Do not visit if you and sometimes these feelings - feelings of loneliness and isolation from the outside world, a feeling of uselessness and the inner emptiness?

If so, do not be discouraged. Although alone and a little pleasant in any case, this does not die. In other words, loneliness - it's like a signal. Hunger sends a signal that it's time to eat.

The feeling of loneliness has warned that we are not close enough, companionship. Food is needed to maintain vitality. A chat - to maintain composure. Did you watch the coals? If you get a piece of coal from the general pile, he quickly goes out. But if you throw it back, he is heating up again!

And we, the people, being cut off from the outside world for a long time can not "burn" - our life force is gradually fading. After all, we initially laid down the need for communication.

Chronic loneliness.

However, in some cases, the oppressive feeling of loneliness does not want to retreat, and it seems like it will never end. That's what tells the senior Roman: "I was eight years old I go to the local school, but so far no one has made friends! Nobody knows how I feel, but no one before and do not care. Sometimes I think that I can not stand it anymore! "

Many young people, like Roman, faced with the so-called chronic loneliness. How can you recover from pneumonia, so you can get rid of chronic loneliness. First you need to find out why it occurs. 16-year-old Tanya highlights one of the most common causes of chronic loneliness:

"I think I am very lonely, because ... well, in general, can not be with someone to be friends, if you are dissatisfied with himself. I myself do not particularly like me." Reason alone Thani lies in itself. Lack of self-esteem prevents it from being more open and find yourself friends. One researcher says: "Those who are chronically lonely tend to think of himself:" I'm not attractive "," With me interested, "" I'm no use to anyone. "

Did you manage to get rid of feelings of loneliness, developing self-esteem. And when you learn to yourself for something to love, and then the surrounding notice your attractive qualities. But remember that the flower appears in all its glory, only when he dissolved, and your dignity really appreciate only when you open your them.

You do not need to engage in self-abasement and revel in self-pity. Shake, loan business, find yourself an interesting exercise, write poems, learn to play guitar, well, think of something. Your loneliness is due, firstly, with the typical problems of adolescence, and secondly, with the features of your character.

If there is no other, blame yourself. No approach to the proposal of friendship, if you look sad and depressed. Such people are not attracted to the other, and push away from itself.

Alone, but not lonely.

* "I never met a more sociable companion than loneliness."

Is not it true noticed? "Yes, - meets 20-year-old Boris. - I like to spend time in nature. Sometimes I go to the lake, sail from the coast in their small boat and long sitting there alone. This situation has to ensure that quietly reflect on themselves and their life. For me it's very important. "

Agrees 21-year-old Simon. "I live in a large apartment building, - he says - and if I need to be alone sometimes climb onto the roof. There I was about something thinking. It gives me strength." Yes, moments of solitude, if they correctly use can bring great satisfaction.

What to do if you feel bad?

First, you must realize that you are not alone. Carefully observe people around you, and you will find carefully concealed a sense of dissatisfaction. When tomorrow you go to school, calmly watched the students, who met on the way to school. I assure you that many of them have the same problems that afflict thee.

How to learn to manage stress

Stress management, how to manage stress

What is stress and how to learn to manage stress. How to do so as not to stress to control you, and you manage stress? What to do in a stressful situation.

According to the research of Russian and foreign scientists, the causes of stress in 70% of cases is the work and everything connected with it.

Imagine: your project is almost finished - and suddenly demolish all contingencies.

You for no reason at all offended, or worse, slandered colleagues, boss. To claim victory in the tender, higher salaries, positions, but your expectations are not met. Some of the households in need of assistance, and you are immediately sent on a business trip.

So you can transfer indefinitely. All this will inevitably impact on health. Employment and dismissal - also a kind of stress.

Stress in the translation from English - "tension", "Pressure", now by that word we mean a blow to the nervous system.

Reaction to the incident in a person usually instantaneous. The range is huge - from "thrown into a fever" to ... myocardial infarction. Constant stress can not occur in a particular disease, they are remarkably similar to chronic fatigue syndrome: low performance, passivity, irritability, lethargy, insomnia.

However, in contrast to the stress syndrome can be expressed in increased business activity. Such a person acting under the fear of defeat in the competition, participates in the race for success and wealth.

It does not leave a feeling of anxiety, that sooner or later he would be fired for any blunders that behind an imaginary opponent literally comes on the heels, that can not cope with the tasks assigned, and so on. D. And as a consequence - high blood pressure, heart attack, stomach ulcer.

Alexei Petrovich worked all my life in a large enterprise, and always was listed in the advanced workers. He worked his way from the master to the technical director of the company, won the esteem and respect. But he was constantly dissatisfied with something, worried: the task exceeded by two hundred percent - little can do more ... and so on.

And one of such sorting Alexei Petrovich had a heart attack. It lies in the factory hospital, listening to the conversations of other employees who do a lot worse, and thinks, "What am I still lacking? ".

How to do so, so as not to stress to control you, and you manage stress?

Suppose there was a conflict with the leadership. Are you trying to prove a point, but you do not want to listen to and, moreover, threaten to dismiss, if the order will not be executed. Are you sure you can not do that (a matter of principle).

The first wish - to give up the head on the table a letter of resignation, but it is not an option. Scolds about leadership, and then begin to tear himself appears grudge against the world and the unfairness of life.

To be in such dangerous thoughts. Was overcome your personal feelings in the situation will not change, and will only lead to a dead end.

First try not to flog a fever, calm down any way you can: count to ten, get to fresh air, wash or drink a glass of water, take a sedative, to smoke in the end.

Then, calmly and rationally think about the situation, not burying its head in the sand, without delving into the experiences ... Calm down? Here you have already begun and stress management, as made an effort and are willing to overcome it.

Be sure to monitor the progress of his thoughts. Do not be amiss to say to himself: "All that is done, all the better," even if everything seems to be happening a disaster.

Do not indulge in despondency.

Analyze the situation. You do not understand what is going on - demand an explanation, to draw conclusions and take action, action, action. Anyone who considers himself a loser in the end, after two or three conflicts sure they will.

It should mobilize to show strength of character. You can not focus on the question: "How did this happen? "You must find a way out. How often we hear the phrase in an emergency situation: "Do as anything! ".

I feel responsible for what is happening. Try to prove his innocence, do not select the position of the unfortunate victim: it is a losing. Based on the fact that this situation you will only benefit.

And for this we must work his head, as there is nothing stronger than reason, to subjugate the vicissitudes of pain and injustice. It is in the "storms of life is forged the character"

... In a large trading company sales fell sharply. Explain the situation could not, and the president has decided to fight back at the department of marketing and advertising. He gathered all the employees in the office and not a stone was left of their work.

But it was not taken into account that the money for advertising isolated few, proposed projects almost did not function, therefore, product very few people knew, of course, very few people bought.

After listening to the head with dignity, director of marketing and advertising said the following: "Of course, in the fall of sales is our fault. We propose the following measures .... " At this time, all the proposals were adopted by the department.

How to learn to manage stress?

Take it as a given, without losing respect for himself, it is sure to increase your ability to handle stress. It is important to understand why the "wanted the best, but it turned out ...." Our understanding of the work performed, as well as understanding of the world, unfortunately, is not perfect.