The love story I still love you

A few days later, I chose to visit Margot. It is strange that we still communicate with her. We met in a music school, almost fifteen years ago, and I always wondered how different we are! From music and hobbies, ending men, our views diverged around, but it did not prevent us to support each other during this time. And if someone is bad, we both knew where to call.
My trip was not very entertaining, the goal was to make a tattoo, but this procedure proved to be fun for me. People often ask, looking at my drawing, "and it hurt? " Yes! This is very painful. Even considering my tolerance for pain sensation was still very painful! Soothing only one thought that everything would soon be over. When I saw the result of effort wizard, more skilled workers, slightly puzzled, can something I do not understand, but oh well, wait and see. On a small twig cherry she managed slapped blue, burgundy, green, brown, pink and where? And these leaves on the neck at all, in my opinion, were not the topic!
The deed is done, and a sense of accomplishment, I returned to Krasnodar to my branch quietly heal .  On the way to the house, to which I had become accustomed, in the tram, I carefully looked through ads, billboards and other outdoor advertising .  And then my eye caught pillar (who do not know, it's such a fold-out piece, which is usually put at the entrance to the institution, office, cafe, shorter portable information storage medium), which read about a set of training courses on various programs .  CorelDraw has been one of them, I also have the knowledge of the amateur program Photo Shop .  But this knowledge is required for CorelDraw designer, I considered all the jobs, and this interested me more than any other .  Coming out of the tram, I went to the institution, which calls for a visit to their courses .  I check rates, time, and realized that it was exactly what I needed .  It remains to find the required amount .  A trip to Margo Novoros to me several overspend again to ask him? Let's see, maybe be able to wriggle out?
The world around us still, nothing happened, silence enveloped me like a bell, the window is seething life, and I have no-thing. Full calm as before the storm. I spent ten days alone, not counting the occurrence of Viti, who brought the money and did not even gone, because, as he said he was very busy, I would add - painfully busy. ESP training, I pay half and the other half had planned to give the following cash injections. The first two lessons were successful - did not understand anything! All clear for as long as you poke your finger on the right "tool". But, doing homework, comes the realization of complete stupor, but I hoped it was a temporary anyway dokolupayus what's what.
Recently the need to pay rent and utilities, so he will be here soon, so I waited for it! Flowers have healed, and though I did not like the colors, I wanted to know his opinion. And he came and left the money was gone. The door slammed shut, I slid to the floor, trying not to scream loudly in pain roared. What hurts the worst of it? Indifference. If I used anything could feel now it was chilling wall. "The brunette in a pink blouse" in comparison with this pain trifle, not worthy of attention. I do not want to! I can not go, do not want and will not !! Spilling salt water from my eyes, I dialed Margo.
- Hello - I led normal breathing, it's time to calm down. These female things - in the sense of tears - I never helped, and if someone from them is easier, to me for some reason, on the contrary, even worse.
- Hi what happened? - Margot worried. I briefly told her about the last episode, she asked:
- Margo, throw on the cards that we will have with him? There is the future? - Everything inside was torn to pieces. After a brief silence, until Margo throwing cards, she said:
- His way into the house, to you, all closed - we were both silent, what can I add? In complete stupor, I sat in the kitchen, until it got dark. It's time. If his road is closed to me in this house, then you need to move to another. My footsteps echoed echoed in half-empty space of the apartment, I could fall in love with her. The only room I stared at the bed, soaking up every little thing that is happening here, with him. No, going - go! Stop clinging to castles in the air! You're currently up myself, it was just sex, but you let yourself fall so !? As allowed and fired .... Tears welled up in his eyes again, but I chased them will not help.
I do not know how to describe the state in which I came to my parents. It seems to me, and in fact an empty space inside me was dark and empty. In any case, I still have four lessons in the course, so I have more time to pull their nerves and to come back to where to go is not wanted.
We sat in the kitchen with his mother, Birdie had a quiet hour, go to her after five .  The postman brought a notice to a registered letter addressed to me .  What could it be? I do not know, may be the last to court some piece of paper come from? I went to the post office, there is of course all "friendly" staff, and unhappy life of older people .  Having a thick envelope, I went out into the street, where it immediately and uncovered .  Several times re-read the same phrase - "... the court will be held December 5, 2011 ...", but did not believe my eyes .  Is that a joke? I beat shiver, I just felt the hard way what a "knife in the back" .  Lesch, "keeping his word" as a real man, filed a counterclaim "to determine the child's place of residence" .  The reasons for this he had all .  I was not working, Birdie is still with them, and it was their trump card .  I returned home, put all the pieces of paper that were enclosed in the envelope .  What there just was not! The city administration has issued a certificate stating that such and such a child does not care and do not live in the city, on what basis it was issued and by whom ?! Our common kum also sign up to all this, for some reason it hurt .  Basically, he is a friend Lesha, not mine, so that you can understand it .  Yet how disgusting! Somehow from this Leschi podlyanki I did not expect, he was always a man of his word, I have known him for over fifteen years! Here I could not swallow the female emotion as tears .
- So, Marin, you are now going to them as if nothing had happened, picks Minor. Come back here, we sit in the car and leave all together in Belorechensk to Aunt Lena, where they will not find us - rapped mom looking at my utter helplessness. It has long been suggested that option, but I always found excuses and reasons not difficult to guess why. With tears in his eyes, I dialed Leschi.
- Yeah, - he drawled smugly into the phone.
- And you're done, keep your word! I decided myself a birthday present to do? - Choking back tears, I said.
- Yes, we meet fifth of December, at the same time to congratulate me - it was said as if he had already won a court victory in his voice. All the good that I have had for this man, died at the same moment, I do not know him, he is a stranger.
I big deal to assemble the pieces themselves, to stick on your face no meaningful expression to pick up the bird. Sitting in the car on the way to Belorechensk, I wondered. What awaits me next? I did not know. We still have so much to do. Find the money for a lawyer, if I do come to court - I will tear. Find a job and housing, with the aunt, I was going to live not. And erase from his mind of one man, without whom the world has lost all its charm and glamor. Unseeing eyes I saw off city where grown. Birdie sat on my hands. No feelings of regret or loss .... Everything goes wrong. A new round of my life. After all, if I can not change the current scenario of events, then I choose another!

PART II

- You Th, shit ... doing ?! Where are you f ... ?! I'll come and take my daughter! And if you do not tell me where she is, I'll blow a fucked m ... your whole house !!! - Alex broke in earnest, for it was a big surprise that I decided to pick up the bird. For the first time it is inserted into a conversation with me a number of interjections obscene content. I was scared. I was afraid that if they do find us in such a rage, that will be a disaster. My phone began to boil from incoming calls from the tube fell threat. I tried not to panic and to remain calm, but every time I jumped on the spot, when the phone started to make sounds. All those who bring me out of balance with their telephone conversations, I have identified in the black list.
Aunt Lena, my father's sister, greeted us with open arms, in contrast to her husband, this individual hit his sullenness and resentment. As she lived with him for so many years and still not run? We have identified a little daughter a separate room. The first night for a long time has passed uneasily together. We have become estranged from each other, a sad statement of fact, but it was true. Well, we have plenty of time to catch up!
I hit the road to Krasnodar, to complete their education .  The last day in the apartment was troublesome: they had to pack up, clean up, as if I were not here .  How do so many things? I came here with a bag and a laptop, and now? It is good that my sister's husband agreed to take it all in Krymsk .  Items collected in a heap near the door .  Sitting on the bed, in silence, in parting, I sent him a sms "key on the panel, thank you for the holidays" .  All .  Dot .  Treacherous tears still ran down my cheeks, I'm really wanted to be with him, but with the same madness longed to wipe him out of my head and other organs .  So much pain in my life in such a short period of time I felt one day - today .  Out of sight, out of mind - saying not invented from scratch, the wisdom of the people came .  Means and will eventually .  Peep phone, "sorry", I read a message from Viti .  Who you're sorry ?! Or what ?! In a fit of anger cherkanul "outlive" .
Glorious city Belorechensk met me by the dim light of lanterns. I have made no difference, in which city to live, I did not feel the change of place, it was the same everywhere. So when my aunt was struck by a brilliant idea to send me to work in Sochi, I do not fight, I did not care where I'll be. Though in Khanty-Mansiysk, purple! "... And I'm not afraid, a train ticket, which - it does not matter .." - hysterically sang the nerves in my player until Aunt Lena to talk about as well in Sochi, and what sort of salary.
I was walking down a dark street, or was it a basement, ground floor and can not know. Near the terminal, he stood, his head bowed, she thought, "I will pass over, I will not shake hands, as if he did not see." "Stand where to go! "- I have heard the cry of mock-mandative Viti. I froze. Slowly turned to face him, met his gaze, in his eyes there was so much love! He pulled me to him and began circling, like a little girl. "Hold Me Tight" - I whispered, breathless with overwhelming happiness. My eyes were opened, they were tears, it was just a dream. But this is real, I even felt the smell, the warmth of hands, heard the beating of his heart. But only a dream ...
The next day, Victor called me. I asked why the left. Since the reasons to do it was enough, I told him the story of the counterclaim, the court once and now I'm in Belorechke. In general, "film and the Germans", as well as my ex-husband is the owner of a German family, the joke turned to this topic. The rest of it does not necessarily know. Victor here proved himself the patron of all those in need, he has promised to help with a lawyer, give money. At least one chip on my shoulder.
Further events developed rapidly .  I was in constant traveling: Krymsk, Krasnodar, Sochi, Belorechensk .  As he had promised to help with money for a lawyer, but it was not enough .  I managed to find another twenty, do not ask how, you still will not believe it! I myself still amazed that the money came to me just like that, they gave me for the beautiful eyes, probably do not know .  But these people I do in my life seen .  As if we met just to help me, and all the function is performed .  The second trip to Sochi became decisive for me in terms of the place of residence .  I looked at the ivory palm, barberry, black sand at the beach, green foliage, which remained on the trees, despite the fact that already was December .  And in my head there was a question: God, what am I doing here? I do not want to be here, I want him .  In a city where there is one chance in a million to meet him! If you are a teacher took me into the garden, then in Krasnodar will take, even with the lack of experience .
The court passed without my participation, I issued a power of attorney to a lawyer. As he later told me, "your sister's ex-husband just fumed and raged, trying to prove to the court that you are shiftless mother." I think everyone understands that it was only a mild formulation of everything that happened there. But a meeting of the court was not enough. Appoint a second hearing. For the final decision did not have the facts, namely, "the conditions of the child's place of residence."